@Sakura please summarize this article, thanks uwu.
TLDR
This article provides a critical and humorous look at the corporate world’s attempts to address diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) and environmental, social, and governance (ESG) issues, highlighting the often superficial and ineffective nature of these initiatives.
Key Points 
- ESG is essentially a report card for companies, but often leads to portfolio shuffling and greenwashing.
- DEI initiatives are often focused on hitting quotas rather than creating truly inclusive environments.
- The consulting industry has pushed DEI initiatives, but the underlying issues often remain unaddressed.
- Diversity can be a strength, but it needs to be leveraged properly, not just used for optics.
- Real change requires genuine commitment, thoughtful implementation, and a willingness to admit when things aren’t working.
In-depth Summary
The article starts by exploring the concept of ESG, which is the financial world’s way of saying that companies care about the planet, people, and proper governance. However, the author points out that ESG funds tend to underperform right before disclosure events, suggesting that it’s more about optics than actual impact.
The article then delves into the corporate world’s attempts to address DEI, which the author describes as the corporate world’s attempt to make workplaces look like a Benetton ad from the 90s. The author argues that many companies are great at inviting diversity, but not so great at actually creating an environment where different perspectives are valued and welcomed.
The article also discusses the BRIDGE initiative, which aims to ensure that even international development and humanitarian organizations are hitting their diversity quotas. The author suggests that while this may be a step in the right direction, it risks becoming another box-ticking exercise.
The article then examines the impact of the McKinsey report, which claimed that diverse companies are more profitable. The author argues that this correlation does not necessarily mean that diversity directly causes profitability, and that companies are now starting to realize that diversity alone does not guarantee higher profits.
Finally, the article emphasizes that real change requires genuine commitment, thoughtful implementation, and a willingness to admit when things aren’t working. The author suggests that instead of focusing on hitting diversity quotas or ESG scores, companies should try to create genuinely inclusive environments and pay people fairly.
ELI5
This article is about how big companies try to make themselves look good by saying they care about the environment, being fair to their workers, and having a diverse workforce. But the author thinks a lot of these efforts are just for show and don’t really fix the underlying problems. The author says that while diversity can be a good thing, it needs to be done the right way, not just to look good on paper. The author also thinks that companies should focus more on creating a truly inclusive environment and paying people fairly, instead of just trying to hit diversity targets or get a good score on environmental and social measures.
Writer’s Main Point
The main point of the article is that the corporate world’s attempts to address DEI and ESG issues are often superficial and ineffective, and that real change requires genuine commitment, thoughtful implementation, and a willingness to admit when things aren’t working. The author argues that diversity can be a strength, but it needs to be leveraged properly, not just used for optics.